Rod: No, Barry needs a new brain!

Barry: <groaning> Why do I need a new brain? Yours isn’t so wonderful right now either.

Rod: Why do you say that?

Barry: Because you are under the influence of Earth alcohol.

Rod: I told you it has no effect on me.

Barry: And I told you what the report said, that it causes our lifeform to become cranky and easily angered.

Rod: No it doesn’t.

Barry: Yes it does.

Rod: Not it DOESN’T!!!

Barry: I rest my case.

Rod: I just hope this stops your avatar kick.

Barry: Why do you not like it so?

Rod: Because of your menial tasks remark. In the movie, their avatars did everything that the planet’s lifeforms did.

Barry: So, the avatars did the menial tasks and were just like the lifeforms?

Rod: Yes they were.

Barry: Hold that thought. I’ll be right back.

Rod: Why does that make me nervous?

Barry: Okay, that’s done.

Rod: What’s done?

<doorbell rings>

Barry: You are about to find out. This avatar is acting like the lifeforms on this planet.

Rod: In what way?

Barry: This avatar is not getting mad over that beating, but getting even.

Rod: How are you going to do that, Blueboy?

Barry: The guy that just came in appears on the Syfy show, NXT. I told him you said some very nasty things about his maternal unit.

Barry: What happened?

Rod: Nothing. You just went through the “web” and hit your head against the tree. Thankfully, everything is going to be okay.

Barry: Thanks! I was worried I’d hurt myself.

Rod: Actually I was talking about the tree. Your hard head didn’t damage it.

Barry: Your level of concern is underwhelming.

Rod: I am concerned. You put that tree, which is a native life form on this rock, in danger!

Barry: What do you mean in danger? I was the one in danger when my web failed.

Rod: I was worried about you till I saw you hit your head. I knew you were okay then.

Barry: Thanks a lot…..NOT!

Rod: What do you expect? Using “Silly String” to make a web, using that poor tree? You could have poisoned that innocent tree.

Barry: Rod, it is just a tree. It is a plant and you know the rules regarding plants on our home world.

Rod: But that is there and this is Earth. Besides that, what in the name of the Doctor made you think that you could make a web with this stuff….

Barry: I did it….

Rod: And whatever gave you the motivation to think it would support your weight…

Barry: It works for Spiderman….

Rod: And why did you attempt it using our ship, knowing that the radiation from its reactor caused some substances, especially the stuff in this can, to become weakened.

Barry: Ah……eh………I forgot about that.

Rod: What makes you think you can be like Spiderman? You have not been bitten by a genetically altered spider!

Barry: I just looks so easy in the movie.

Rod: That explains it.

Barry: What do you mean?

Rod: Easy is all your brain can handle.

Rod: Romantic?? Are you out of your mind????

Barry: I think it is very romantic.

Rod: There wasn’t a romantic letter in that entire note!

Barry: Yes there was and it got me right here! <points to heart>

Rod: Did you listen to the note I read to you?

Barry: Yes I did.

Rod: Did you hear where she want us to get the Earth scouted out for destruction?

Barry: Sadly, yes.

Rod: Did you hear where she said if we didn’t she’d cut our hearts out?

Barry: Absolutely.

Rod: And give our hearts to her Tilaxian dogs for Breakfast?

Barry: Loud and clear!

Rod: And you still think that was romantic?

Barry: It most certainly was!

Rod: And where did you get your sense of romance…..Earth’s Marquis de Sade?

Barry: Of course not.

Rod: Okay, I give up! Show me where she was romantic.

Barry: Two reasons: first, she has a strong love for her dogs! Most owners throw the bodies to them and make the dogs dig the heart out.

Rod: I’m scared to hear the second one.

Barry: Second, she showed she cares for us deeply!

Rod: Where in that note of death did you see that?

Barry: Normally, instead of cutting out hearts, she throws her victims to the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal!

Barry: Gets you right there? I should get you something for between your ears….a BRAIN!

Rod: Why do you say that?

Barry: You think she stole your wallet and you are sending her a Valentine? That for starters!

Rod: But you don’t understand….I’m trying to use Earth Psychology on her.

Barry: How do you figure that?

Rod: By doing this, I’m appealing to her maternal instincts as a woman to do the right thing.

Barry: Yeah, right. You are doing it because she must have been a beauty.

Rod: She wasn’t just a beauty. She was hot, dude!

Barry: How hot was she?

Rod: Like the guy on late night TV would say it, She is so hot, places that advertise hot food will have to call it Selena food.

Barry: That must be…….Selena? Hmmmm………..Selena…..stolen wallet……….What was she wearing?

Rod: A skin tight jumpsuit, all black.

Barry: This is going from bad to worse…….When the bartender asked if her drink was okay, how did she answer him?

Rod: She said it was Purrrrfect.

Barry: You are right, she probably got your wallet. I hope you didn’t have something in it that you usually keep there.

Rod: What do you mean?

Barry: Your miniaturized emergency communicator that speed dials HER!

Rod: Oh NO! It WAS in there.

Barry: You are in SO much trouble now.

Rod: If she pushes that button and it calls HER, I wonder what will happen.

Barry: Well, I don’t know what will happen to you, but I think I can predict what SHE will say.

Rod: What’s that?

Barry: SHE will tell Selena that she is the first lifeform on this rock that shows her promise!